A Knight and Paper
by Scarabbug
Summary: Ace writes. Only, Lightning Knight’s and paper really don’t mix too well. Nor do Lightning Knights and having to find justifications for secrets. Normally they’re just… right. Right?


**I'm also don't think Ace is really this deep about stuff, but what the heck. I promise I'll try and keep the profound emotional stuff to a minimum.**

**This story is spell checked, but unbeta-ed (enjoying the all nighter, Sarah? ;P)**

**Disclaimer: Ace Lightning and all associated characters are in no way my property, this story is written for fun with no aims at gaining profit. The character Molto (mentioned only briefly) is copyrighted to ficwriter Wile. E. Coyote.

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Letters to a Mortal.

Hey kid. It's me.

Wait, how are you going to know that, anyway? I mean it's not as if you can _see_ me and… I've never done this before, so it's not as if you know my handwriting.

OK, let me try that again.

Hey kid, Lightning here.

You know, somehow, that just doesn't feel right either…

Damn. What's wrong with that good, old fashioned communication device, huh kid? I mean this whole letter writing stuff isn't what it's cracked up to be. Mortals should make tougher writing equipment anyway. Every time I try to pick up a pen it breaks in two.

But… I guess I thought it'd be worth a shot. It's something a friend of yours said that didn't actually make much sense to me at the time. Something about how words sometimes get stuck in a mortal's throat and paper being a better way to show what you're feeling?

OK. I've been making that pretty clear lately anyway, you know, what with the anger issues and the almost-sending-Chuck-into-oblivion and the…

Never mind. Sorry, rambling.

Back on the point. I wanted to talk to you about something. Actually about a number of things. Mostly Sparx…

Hm. That's strange. I've actually started this now, and I know who it's about, but… I don't exactly know where to take it. Well. I guess the beginning would be the best place to start. I guess I'm talking way back now.

I'm not going to lie to you, kid. When I first came to your world I didn't have the slightest idea in oblivion what was going on. It was a world like nothing I'd ever seen before and I personally won't be too disappointed if I never see another like it again. Not that it's overly dangerous or anything, it's just... so much more complicated than the others. No offence. But then I guess that's nothing compared to how you felt.

Hey, this isn't so hard once you get into it.

And… basically, that's what I'm trying to tell you, Mark. I don't want her to know about it.

I think you know what I'm talking about. You see as far as Sparx knows, the Sixth Dimension is the place where she was created, born if you want. A whole world with rules and ideas, not just a game in a box with my name on it.

She'd at least want it to have _her_ name on it, too...

Some game.

I don't know much about this world, kid, but I know this: there are some things you're better off not knowing. So that's how I want us to keep it. For now, anyway.

But then, I guess you know all about keeping secrets, don't you?

I know you tried to tell me once, but I guess I just didn't want to hear it. You can't blame me, can you?

I'd go to White Hot Oblivion and back for her, and she knows it. I just don't think she's ready, Mark. Not for that. I don't think she'll _ever_ be ready to know that.

So, what do you say? Can you help me keep that secret a little longer?

Because I know that _you_ know that if she had any idea about any of this, then…

Then... okay, I guess I really _don't_ know what would happen, but one thing's for sure, it wouldn't be a nice walk in Harpix Park.

You don't really know that much about Sparx, so I guess I should tell you, just so this makes a little more sense before you start arguing. (I know you, Mark, I can see you look on your face _right_ now). I met her in Shellshock Town. If I recall rightly, she was part of a new mining settlement that had just set up base there, not too far away from Canary Warp. Canary Zoar-damned Warp... I have_ got_ to wonder about these people, sometimes. Why would ANYONE settle somewhere so dangerous? Anyhow, Sparx was one of the first people I saw when I came along to stop the first attack. She was cowering near the pier during a Kamikaze Canary bombardment. I was just about to go rescue her when all of a sudden… bang! She started shooting out waves of lightning (from her _eyes_, oddly enough.

It's where her name came from. She wasn't exactly great at controlling it at first so the sparks went everywhere. Kinda had more of a ring to it than "Amandine". Not very focussed –you could already tell she was gonna be one of those who needed a focusing artefact) but otherwise: Lightning Knight. No doubt about it.

She smiled at me. I smiled back. Funny, that neither of us saw any reason to talk, especially considering that this was her. We already knew _something_ was going to happen. We knew right then and there that whatever we did next, it was going to be for life. I held out a hand, and she took hold of it. That was it. We had our first "Waif Recruit" (as they called them) of the cycle.

I don't know where her parents went. We never found them.

Her first assignment after graduation was in White Hot Oblivion. That had me a little riled. It's not the kind of place you usually send new recruits fresh out of the Academy. But then, our forces were stretched from battling Lord Fear, at the time. So it was me, Sparx, and another Waif Recruit whom we called Molto (chosen specifically for her flame and fire related abilities, which were bound to be a help in that particular environment... we weren't all _Lightning_ related considering that they called us _Lightning Knights_, did I ever tell you?) who got sent off to the Red Hot Springs. We had been told about a disturbance down there and were expecting to find a Pockle hoard or a bunch of Mine Monsters of Fireshooters or Harpix that needing herding out. But that wasn't what we got.

No, what was actually down there was the Mining Settlers that we first met on Canary Warp. Sparx's _home_. Apparently, not content with trying to set up in a hellhole like Canary Warp they decided WHO was also a suitable for living. They said there were good minerals down there that nobody had ever bothered to process. They didn't seem to think about _why_ this actually was. The whole place is a total death trap. Unstable cliffs, lava flows, a high threat of explosion or quake wherever you went.

Crazy, the lot of them. Seriously. We tried to talk them out of there. They were in the path of Zoar knows how many lava flows and in the direct view of a Harpix nest to boot. Not to mention long term exposure to the volcanic fumes… But no, it was all about getting the minerals before they were destroyed in a lava flow.

Now that I think about it, they probably really _were_ crazy. All of them. Impulsive, reckless, stubborn, fond of dark and/or unpredictable locations… Miners can be like that. I guess we know where Sparx got it.

They wouldn't come. No matter how we tried. And we tried hard, kid. Molto even gave them a practical demonstration of exactly what would happen to them if they didn't move by holding rocks between her hands and melting them (her idea - and Molto was approximately 500-degrees _cooler_ than the volcanoes. It was the closest we ever got to moving them). Sparx pleaded with everyone she knew over and over. I've never seen her look like that or sound like that before. So... desperate. Angry. Scared.

They just stared at her, as if she was a complete stranger… like they'd never known her. Like she wasn't one of them anymore. Maybe she wasn't, after we took her away to train her in the proper use of her powers. Even if it was for the best. Miners _don't_ abandon their own, for any reason.

It hurt her. It hurt her a lot.

But then, I guess all that stuff of doesn't matter anymore. Because it's not real, is it? There's no such place as Canary Warp or Lightning HQ or Hot Springs or White Hot Oblivion, and it's not really the Sixth Dimension that made Sparx the way she is, or me the way I am. It's just the way the programmer wanted us to be, and how he planned us out.

But... we're still _here_, right?

Thank Zoar that creep is well out of the way. For a while anyway.

Oh wait… Zoar isn't real either. The City (did you know it was a City? people usually think it was a person. It was, in a way. _Lots_ of people. But the City was the most important part) was just part of the game plan. I expect you have something about it in that guidebook of yours, right? I mean… maybe you could tell me what you know, sometime? Maybe your version of the truth might be better than mine.

Damn. You know, kid, for a world which was never even real, it sure _felt_ like it. And Lady Illusion… now she's _trapped_ there, and I can't talk to her and…

I'm still not all that sure what to think about that. She saved me, Mark. She-saved-_me_. Isn't that meant to be _my_ job? I knew she would. Well, I didn't _know_ she would, right then and there but, if it ever came down to it, I was still sure somehow that she'd want to protect me. And I knew I'd do it for her, too. I loved her that much.

And she was a bad guy.

I know, I know. That's Sparx's line, she's been saying it all this time but… I think it only just hit me right now.

Zoar. This is really _not_ in the rulebook, is it?

Heh. So _that's_ what you meant. Yeah, kid, I heard you. The music wasn't _that_ loud. I heard a lot of stuff I think you thought I didn't. It's okay, though. I want you to know, I'm not mad at you about it. It's just… confusing, really. Not quite knowing where you really came from. Discovering it's all been a lie. I'm not sure I'd know how to explain it, either.

I guess I'll get used to it.

You know, Chuck said something weird about that the other day. We were talking and he said something like: "we forget everything we were to begin with, too." Is that true? He said something about not being able to remember the first few years of his life at all, except for maybe the odd glitch here and there. So really, you must rely on the other people around you to tell you everything you were from the beginning and…

Well, how can you trust them to be telling the truth? What if one of them decides to lie to you? Mortals are pretty good at lying. Um... no offence meant, kid.

See, my past's not like that, Mark. I can see it all _so_ clearly. Program-days, kids toys, best friends, worst enemies, accidents, special events, graduations, attacks, battles, wars, unsavoury sessions in the House of Illusion Sugar Pits (not nearly as nice as they sound)... I remember it _all_. Every last _second_. But humans can't even always remember what they had for breakfast the day before. Chuck and me even looked it up. There's hardly a single mortal in the whole world who can remember _everything_ that happened to them in their lives the same way we do. So… how do we know you're real and I'm not? How do we know you're not the programs?

...I guess I'm rambling again, huh, kid? Sorry.

Anyway, after a while...

Um, hang on, kid. I'd better go stop Sparx ramming the Lightning Flash through the-

Too late.

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Hi. I'm back, kid. (There's a hole in the door, but I'm back). Where were we? 

Oh, yeah.

After a while, I got to thinking about what you said to me that night, about being a hero even when you didn't feel like it. And I realised that you were right: where you come from really _doesn't_ matter. The circumstances surrounding your birth are completely irrelevant, when you get down to it. It's the choices we make that define who we are. And I was here, making choices and now it had nothing to do with what I thought I was supposed (or should that be _programmed?_) to do, and everything to do with it being what I _wanted_ to do.

I'm not sure Sparx would see it that way, though. And… well, come on. Nobody deserves to know something like that. I wish_ I_ didn't know.

I don't want you to feel bad or anything, for all those times you tried to tell me (or, more importantly, all those times you _didn't_ try to tell me). I know you were just trying to do what you thought was best. You just went around it in an odd way. I never listened to you. I don't think Sparx would listen to me, either, even if I _did_ try and tell her the truth. I remember how she was after we got back from White Hot Oblivion. The volcanoes erupted "big time", as Chuck might say, a few hours later and raged down on the camp in temperatures even Molto couldn't have stood up against. We spent a couple of days around the gateway perimeter while it was being quardened off, and Sparx would be out there, stood on the hillside every day, looking back into it, as if she expected... Well, I guess she was afraid to admit they might really be gone. But they were. Sparx doesn't like accepting things that hurt her.

It's not fair, Mark. Do you get what I'm trying to say?

She was ignored by her family and had to watch them die… and she was wiped out, and shot up and had to deal with all of this… awfulness. We all did. I'm not even touching on what happened to Random Virus.

And it wasn't even _real_?

Explain to me how this works, kid, because even _I'm _confused. There's just... there's no way this could _ever_ work. Not if it brings more pain like that. Emotions are a human, thing, kid. But that doesn't mean Sparx can't feel things like you do. Or I do, now.

So… that's it.

I could probably have said all that in less words, but maybe there is a point to this whole writing business after all. I mean I don't know how I'd ever say all this to your face. I mean you'd probably just be stood there giving me that look the whole time. You know like the look you gave me when you found me stealing energy from your parent's tools and blowing up that… disgusting gnome in the back yard (trust me Mark, that thing had to go). It's kinda the same way I look at Sparx when I know she's gonna go off and do something dumb that I wouldn't be able to talk her out of even if I knew what it was. I just have to follow her best I can and try and pick up the pieces. Sort of like you pick them up for me... often literally.

So… Can you keep a secret?

Thanks kid.

That's all I wanted to say.

Ace.

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**Hm. Okay that was a little iffy, especially towards the beginning. What can I say, I like trying to talk through characters in letters. Reviews and concrit are appreciated.**


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